My musical chairs and flat derriere…

Well, there you have three of them…probably you are thinking, what’s with her now?  This afternoon, after sitting at the computer for a few hours, when I was getting up from the chair, I realized how my derriere was kind of sore.  Then, as you probably know a bit of me by now, I thought, man, I am sitting too much.  Then I thought again, (I am always thinking)  need to do something.  But when I went downstairs to see what’s for dinner, it dawned on me that I was going to have to sit to eat and then to watch the news and my novelas.  Too many musical chairs. 

Wouldn’t it be nice if someone were to invent a chair that nurtured our derrieres.  What I mean by that is (I am sure this is an issue that is not gender biased) that instead of our back’s small protuberance (mine is) disappearing as we more and more sit, there would be chairs that will make our back side really look like a back side and not like a flat piece of board.  That’s the way I look to myself whenever I look on the full length sized mirror.  It is a good investment as everything really shows up.  What you have that is too much, what you are missing, what is out of control and the things that are dropping trying to catch up with gravity.  Right now I am sitting on the edge of my back side so my almost non-existent derriere does not continue to disappear.

Did you think it ends there?  Noooooooo, when you are ready to go out, and you lock your door, what happens next?  There it is!  Another derriere flattener  device  waiting for you.  Your car seat.  I must admit my new cheap chick camera does wonders.  It was dark, really dark outside when I took this picture, and look at the results.  Now, going back to the real issue, I don’t have the foggiest idea what I am going to do about this dilemma.  In the meantime, need to walk some more.  Maybe I can walk while I sleep.  Anything to have a nice looking derriere!  Help out there, need some suggestions.  I am not getting any younger and plumply, everything is going down to meet gravity, all of my parts included.  One of my sisters bought one of those things some women wear to look more plentiful, but I am afraid that if I were to use one of those,  it might turn the wrong side and I may be showing some curves in the wrong places.

These are some real serious issues.   HELP!!!!!

Your Happy Contessa

 P.S.  This posting is for today and tomorrow.  Need to walk some more.  Brrrrrrrrrrr, it is cold outside, but it is either a disappearing derriere or hitting the road!

8 thoughts on “My musical chairs and flat derriere…

  1. lucy

    They sell excercise balls at Walmart different sizes that are supposed to help with this and back problems. I own two different sizes/colors they are very pretty to look at too.

    Reply
    1. happycontessa Post author

      I am being funny, ok? Am I supposed to put those balls on my back side, so it will look bigger? Hahahahahahha…….I will investigate those. Thanks, and hope you are feeling much, much better. Fried chicken, anyone?

      Reply
      1. lucy

        You sit on them and they are supposed to help with posture and form. As I said I have two and they are very pretty to look at :).

  2. happycontessa Post author

    Thank you very much. I guess the principle is that if I keep a good posture, somehow my derriere won’t get the blunt of all the weight of my body, all the weight will be cushioned by the balls. Sounds promising. Gracias! Balls will be cheaper than implants. Not that I have ever considered it. I have a certain (big) degree of narcisism, but a knife back there, no way. 🙂 Rather continue to be flat. I am talking too much.

    Reply
  3. Milagros

    I was all about to write a surprised reply about the fact that my mom was writing about her bottom in a blog – and then I heard the sure sound of mice – which have conveniently saved you from me thinking about your interest in this topic!

    Reply
    1. happycontessa Post author

      For one reason or another, sitting for too long at my age is not good. You still have it! Mice or not, you are very ok. That’s your mama talking. And sweetheart, at this stage of my life, everything is out there. Might as well celebrate whatever it is that is missing or have too much to it. Gracias for opining.

      Reply

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