Noury's Creative World…

I am having dreams of having a piece of cake, or maybe a whole cake.  It would be a many layers vanilla cake with enough frosting and coconut flakes to make me spin on my weight scale.  It would be, oh, so worthy!

At the supermarket today, I went by the bakery section, where I almost purchased a few pieces of different kinds of cakes.  I also went to the aisle where they have the already prepared mixes for cakes, I almost bought a few boxes, lemon cake, strawberry cake, vanilla cake…I guess you get the idea.

Am I pregnant?  By a holy or alien being,  you mean?  There’s not another way.  The few little hormones I have left are struggling with my issues of having a crush on someone.  They can only handle so much.  Other than that…remember, I have an incredibly humongous sense of humor.  You need to take my stuff with many grains of sea salt.  Otherwise…you will never get me.

Back to the cake issue…So I decided after a few minutes of contemplation and pondering while looking at all those delicious but not-good-for-you-trash, that I was having none of those.  An apple and some dried pineapple will suffice in my salad.  Hard life, yes, it is.

I must admit, I am getting a little tired of grazing for lunch, plantains for breakfast and quinoa and black beans for dinner.  I don’t think my taste buds even try to taste the same things over and over again.  I just chew and chew some more.  It is starting to taste like nothing much.  But I am too lazy to develop a new menu.  I will have to do that soon, otherwise one of these days, I am going to have a self-inflicted revolt and go get cake, pie, and ice cream (I am salivating as I am typing this).

For how much longer can I stand all of this turmoil in my life.  Crushes, cakes, pies, skinny pants, stilettos?  Life is getting a bit too complicated.  Maybe I should go hiking the Himalayas and eat grass on my way to the top.  That sounds very appealing.  Need to start researching that idea.  Would my lungs be able to go up so high?  We’ll find out…maybe one of these days…but, on the other hand, I may end up becoming a goat.

Until next time…please have as much cake, pie, and ice cream in my honor.  I almost can taste it already.

Your Happy Contessa

“My life is one big piece of cake… I am loving it and having it too.”  Me

Not for a moment I would doubt my IQ…I never had it tested, and if I would have, there would be a separate category for people like me.  So,  I need to question my perception of distance and height.  Let me explain…

I bought a pair of stilettos thinking they were 5 inches high and I thought…Yeah! I still got it…just to find out when I went to return the shoes that they were not 5 inches…they were at the most 3 1/2 inches high.  She showed me what five inches looked like and I couldn’t close my mouth.  So an apology is in order to my friends of a very famous social network.  I had announced to my limited world of friends (and I like I that way) that I was going to attempt to dance in those shoes.  I just couldn’t get my groove and style flowing with those now known as 3 1/2 inches high.  Another smack on my face given to me by the aging factor.  What else is checking out next?

I am aware of some other things that are shining by their absence, but, on the other hand, some other things have come back into the forefront of my life that I thought were non-existent.  I’ll keep it to myself…but can’t help to share…I think I am infatuated or have a crush on someone, so the happy, butterflies on my stomach feeling is very alive and kicking.  It feels great!

Ok, enough of that…the stilettos showing on the above picture are officially 4 1/2 inches high.  A very dear friend of mine, with whom I spent the afternoon on Mother’s Day had a measuring tape in her purse (she is almost perfect, always prepared), and she made sure I had the height right.  I insisted on trying them on.  No…I couldn’t dance with those sleek and sexy looking shoes.  I need to start accepting in my mind that my body is a good number of decades old.  The mind wants to be sexy, chic and daring, but the body just wants to play safe.  This is not a good thing.  I am definitely not ready for this kind of boring stuff.

Every day that goes by represents a-I-don’t-even-know-what-to-call-it-effect on my mind.  Someone is messing up with my brain, and I am on the search for a solution.  Ponce de Leon and the Fountain of Youth, where the heck are you now.  I am in Florida, and definitely by what I see every day, it is not here.

I can see that my small mean mentality is very active.

So…there you have it…another episode in the life of “life only gets more interesting as you age.”  Shoot the imbecile that said that.

Pondering, but Happy Contessa

I’ve reached that age where my brain went from “you probably shouldn’t say or do that” to “what the hell, let’s see what happens.”  Wish I knew who said that.

Meet the most violent corner of my home.  This is where threats are made to blow up one of the computers.  Please notice I have two, the good-old-friendly one, and the new beast that has a bloody mind of its own.  I have threatened to shoot the new beast with a bb gun I am trying to borrow from a relative, but it really does not matter what I do, say or try to intimidate it with sending it to recycle heaven, the new beast would just do as it —–well pleases.  I need to ponder on the situation because it is really a super fast, super slick, with the magic of LED, so that means everybody look prettier, and I am still paying for it!

This is like a really sour, bad, love-hate relationship going on here.  Who needs a husband, when I have something that behaves like one right here.  Seriously…

I think masochism must be on my DNA because I decided that today was the perfect day to bring out my sewing machine, the one I have not used for years.  I bought that machine to make my own curtains when we moved to North Carolina in 2006.  I calculated that the cost was going to be less than having them done by an outsider versus yours truly, and after I figured out the cost of fabric and sewing machine, etc. we were ahead a couple of hundred dollars.  So, voila, we bought a sewing machine.  Curtains came out really nice, I made sure that the pattern had lines, so all I had to do was sew in a straight line…all the time.  Mission accomplished on that one.

Now let’s move back to the future…this morning I thought about fixing two pair of slacks, croppers, because I really like them, but they are too big for my new version of skinny everything.  Like to show my total absence of curves, if you guess what I mean.  The black pair came out perfect, that was after spending one hour figuring out how to thread the machine and bobbin.  My hair is freaking out by all these new attempts.  The white pair…well, if I was 60 lbs or 30 or so kilos, they would be just perfect.  Now, the question is…I am more tempted to lose the pounds than to face that sewing machine again.

As you notice on the picture, all these machines, when in use make a community of three, versus a population of one on Planet Noury.

I feel sometimes that I need to be careful how deep I breath in my place, because one or all  of these machines may turn on against me at any given moment.

No kidding…or yes, a little.  There’s really nothing, absolutely nothing boring about my life.  Like it that way.

One interesting Cinco de Mayo in my part of the universe.

Happy Contessa

“What there’s not to like about technology and old age.”  Guess who said this.  Bingo!

As you noticed, I did not show my whole body on this picture…there’s a reason or many, many reasons why.

Here in Central Florida summer has arrived, so short sleeves, shorts and all other related items are taking their rightful place in my closet and drawers.

That’s when I started to notice some parts on my body that were not there before the cold season started.  What in the world has happened?  I thought I had managed to keep my weight and shape in check, but…no, oh no!  Horror of horrors…pictures are telling me another story.  I never had an abundance of material around my hips, but now I see things I never noticed before.

This is very serious matter to me.  You all know how vain I am.  If I cut my portions of food there won’t be anything left on the plate for me to munch on.  This is a crisis.  I am serious.

Age is not a helping factor, so I cannot go out there and kill myself jogging, pump iron and do all the kind of things these younger chicks do.  No match for me.  Surgery, heck no… cannot stand the sight of my own blood.  So what am I going to do?

I need divine intervention.  He already knows me and He has an incredible sense of humor, so I have requested an appointment for some guidance and enlightenment.  I am really devastated.  😦

I will keep you posted as to what in the world I am going to do.

Happy Contessa

“I have been dieting all morning…am I skinny yet?”  Someone as desperate as I am.

This Holy Week is very meaningful for a large group of us as people.  For Christians, it means redemption, unconditional love,  and for the Jewish people it means a celebration of remembrance of freedom from slavery.

The most essential things in life are abstract to our senses.  For me, this week is very meaningful because it takes me back to my childhood, when during this week was all about meditating on your life and a promise to do better in the future.  Also, the enormous gratitude for Christ’s unconditional love for all of us.

I am positive that each religion is based on these principles that are the elements or foundation for  all of us as human beings.

Want to take this opportunity to let you know I do appreciate each one of you, because you have been part of my life since my first posting.

May you have a very meaningful week surrounded with the people who mean the most to you.  Even if you are by yourself, remember that you are always surrounded by the love of God.

Happy Contessa

“For God so loved the world that He gave his one and only son….”  John 3:16

Who has taken over my body and my mind?  I feel like the energizer bunny.  Dusting with a rag and spray (I used to use one of those swifter things).  Now the surfaces shine and look new.  Before I used to transfer dust from one place to another.  So after I was done dusting my old way, there was dust left over looking at me.  Now it shines and it looks super good!

I am watching cooking shows and salivating at everything I watch.  Let me make one thing very clear, I do not like to cook.  Usually I have the same things for breakfast, lunch and dinner  I have been doing that for the past three years or so.  Now I am dreaming about getting some new kitchen gadgets, and new supplies to get going.  Even wine is on the list.  I am a H2O woman.  That is going to change.

I am vacuuming even under the furniture.  That’s a first for me.  My late husband used to move everything so he could really vacuum every zinch of the surface.  You could feel the crispness of the fiber of the carpet when you walked on it after he was finished.  I thought he was wasting precious time.  Guess what?  I am doing the same things he used to do.

I am revamping my small space, changing art, adding new beautiful waste baskets, fresh flowers and the list is growing.  My daughter is a pro at making any utilitarian item look glamorous.  I am following her steps.

So…this brings me to the question…what’s going on with me?  In case anyone of you is thinking…no, I am not taking any hormones.  Oh, I forgot to mention, romantic music is on from the moment I wake up to the moment I close my eyes. This item needs a separate posting.  Kind of complicated.  I am a very romantic person.  But there is no time for romance in my life at this exact moment.  I am not ready yet to have another body in my digs and worry about what I am going to have to feed him and all the other details that having a relationship entails.

Where’s my old self?  I need her back.  I can’t stand all this efficiency and neatness.  And the romantic songs issue?  I will leave that one floating throughout the universe.  One thing at a time.

Feeling somewhat good and surprised at this other person that has taken over my space and my self.  But, it is wearing me out.  Need to stop this compulsion about neatness and being busy.

Happy to be happy,

Happy Contessa

“Nothing is less productive than to make more efficient what should not be done at all.”  Peter Drucker, Austrian born American.  Management consultant, author, educator.  19 November 1909 – 11 November, 2005.

This is not exactly where I wanted to end…that color is definitely not good for my skin tone, but the model is in the neighborhood of what I don’t want, but probably will have to settle for.

Had a few pictures of bikinis, but when I went into the Fitting Room, the mirror threatened to jump over the door, because it couldn’t deal with the image that was reflecting back to me.  Too embarrassing that even the mirror couldn’t take it.  I just wanted to try a few to see what was left over of my glorious days.  I remember then…skin smooth, gorgeous glow, no rolly pollies anywhere and just looking ravishingly stunning.  Those were the days…now these days are…what are they?  I don’t have the foggiest idea what has happened to my ever good-looking body.  Now it is just a mass of flesh waiting to be tucked into some jeggings to hurt all over and almost getting killed in the process of taking them out.

My female friends…am I alone in this or is it just me?  Oh, let me address the issue of light and mirrors on some of those Fitting Rooms.  I have never visited a morgue, but I have a pretty good idea what it must be to be in one of those rooms.  I look as if I am 101 years old and let’s not touch the issue of how my hair looks.  I am not going to continue this torture,  because life is kind of ok right now, so getting depressed is not an option.

I spent four…4…hours at the mall today.  Between the mirrors, the lights…I must interrupt to say that H&M and Forever 21 do have the best lights.  Maybe LED?  But, and this is a big BUT…the clothes there are for the younger looking chicks, even though I do have a few pieces from those stores.  Today was not a good day, even there.

Bought a cute skirt at Banana Republic from $89.00 to $21.45 (tax included).  That’s another issue.  Profit margin, anyone?

Well, no bikinis for this whatever you want to call it body.  Need to find a body suit to cover everything except eyes and feet.  But, then I may scare the kids out of their own little suits.  Life is just too strenuous and stressful when it comes to finding coverage to go into the water.  Maybe I’ll just wear shorts and a t-shirt.  But then the filthy older little men will want to be all over me because of a wet t-shirt.  Cannot win.

When I thought the waters were safe again…

Your Happy Contessa

“I am not the sort of woman who would wear high heels with a bathing suit.  Let’s get that straight right now.”  Vera Wang, American fashion designer.  27 June, 1949 – .

P.S.  Now, that’s an idea…high heels with a bathing suit…need to work on that vision.  🙂

There you have me in the raw…lines, marks, etc., etc.  But so what…this is the real me.

This morning while taking my daily walk, a lady stopped her car and asked me if by walking her middle section would get smaller.  I briefly looked at her and saw the middle section, and then…after a millennial second, I said “No.”  Then she asked why do I walk?  I told her that I walk for my heart, for my circulation, to get fresh, just polluted air and all the goodies that come with our environment.  It is what it is.

I think I am better off walking than not because I feel better after I get home, I meet people that have nicknamed me “the walker,” I find out the latest gossip that’s going around and the most important part, I get off my derriere.  It is almost non-existent.

Another benefit is that I get vitamin D from the sun, get my skin a bit darker, which I love.  Yes, I know…the side effect could be not so good.  But I like living dangerously.  That’s as exciting my life gets.  Kidding.  I have a lot of things going on, that I would classify as exciting.  Cannot tell.  I don’t even know myself sometimes what’s going on in my so ever wonderful, magnificent and magical life.  Yep, that’s exactly what it is.

Well…now that you have seen me in the raw, get to know why I walk, you can go on with your own exciting life.

Ta ta

Your Happy Contessa

“There is not a sprig of grass that shoots uninteresting to me.”  Thomas Jefferson, American Founding Father, principal author of the U.S. Declaration of Independence, Third President of the United States.  13 April, 1743 – 4 July 1826.

Note:  By my mistake I deleted the original photo for this posting, so here’s another picture to substitute.

If you have had your happy drink, like tequila, margarita, martini, or whatever, please do not attempt to take off your tall, high heel tight boots, and then your jeggings (2 sizes smaller) without a big break in between.  You may end up breaking your face.

Let me explain.  Recently, I had my two-sizes-too-small-jeggings on, and my tight tall boots, because I didn’t want to look hot, I wanted to look smoking hot.  I can imagine myself leaving a trail of smoke.  What an incredible sight.  🙂  I am laughing my heart out as I am typing, but it is true.

Not too much time left to wear this kind of outfit, you know, without looking somewhat ridiculous, or getting really hurt trying to put them on or taking them off.  Maybe I already look somewhat not so hot,  but so what, it is my body and they are my jeggins.  As Raylene would say, tick, tock, tick, tock, and the darn clock is ticking faster and faster every second of my life.  Meaning to say that in a few years, or maybe next week, I won’t be able to wear the cutest things I do wear now.

Well…One day last week, I came back home from a walkabout looking smoking hot, at least I thought so,  and then without thinking too much started the process of taking off the boots.  That was one for the books.  And I did not have any alcohol in my system.  Thinking about it, maybe a shot of tequila would have made the whole process easier.  Maybe taking a pair of scissors and cutting the jeggings off would have been easier too.

After the boots are off, I started with the jeggings.  I could see that the seams left an impression on my skin, that’s how tight this thing was.  The jeggings refused to go down, so here I am forcing them down, and trying to do one leg at the time, what was I thinking?  There was no space to insert any maneuver of any kind.  This thing was not going down.  That’s when I stood up and tried to walk to see if by being up, the process would be easier.  Really?  I almost fell on my face.  That would have been hard to explain to the ambulance people who would have found me in such a precarious situation and position, and a bloody face.

After about 1/2 hour of deep breathing and meditating to keep my heart rate slow, I was able to be released from such a chamber of torture.  Am I wearing this pair of jeggings again?  You bet!

At least an older woman, like in her late eighties, told me I looked sharp.  Lukewarm compliment, but after the process, I took it very gracefully.

So, my dear co-seasoned compatriots, do not wear extremely tight jeggings and tall boots, and drink at the same time.  You may end up without a face.  I almost did and I only had water.

One more day in my ever eventful life.

Happy Contessa

“There is a fountain of youth:  it is in your mind, your talents, the creativity you bring to your life and the lives of people you love.  When you learn to tap this source, you will truly have defeated age.”  Sophia Loren, Italian actress.  20 September, 1934 -.